What Not To Say To Someone with Depression

Photo by Nik Shuliahin on Unsplash

What is Depression?  Depression (major depressive disorder) is a common and serious medical illness that negatively affects how you feel, the way you think and how you act. Fortunately, it is also treatable.

Depression causes feelings of sadness and/or a loss of interest in activities once enjoyed. It can lead to a variety of emotional and physical problems and can decrease a person’s ability to function at work and at home.

Depression symptoms can vary from mild to severe and can include:

  • Feeling sad or having a depressed mood
  • Loss of interest or pleasure in activities once enjoyed
  • Changes in appetite — weight loss or gain unrelated to dieting
  • Trouble sleeping or sleeping too much
  • Loss of energy or increased fatigue
  • Increase in purposeless physical activity (e.g., hand-wringing or pacing) or slowed movements and speech (actions observable by others)
  • Feeling worthless or guilty
  • Difficulty thinking, concentrating or making decisions
  • Thoughts of death or suicide


I suffer from the major depressive disorder and some days it’s so bad I literally do nothing, no moving around, no eating, no drinking just sit and stare at a wall all day sometimes more than one day.

If it is really bad and affects me for more than two days then you can add not showering to the list of things I don’t do. When it gets to that point then it’s time to go to the Dr or hospital.

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My family has not dealt with anyone that suffers from the major depressive disorder, and they generally will say the wrong things to me but they are just trying to help me, but they make things worse.

But now that they have had to deal with me a couple of times they are getting better.

I’m going to make a list of what NOT to say to someone suffering a bout with major depressive disorder, these things do not help whatsoever. Some of these might be different for you or whoever has a major depressive disorder – these are what upset me worse.

Photo by Tom Pumford on Unsplash

The thing is…is that someone who has never had major depressive disorder just doesn’t have a clue as to the struggle it is just to get out of bed. People who do not suffer from major depressive disorder need to educate themselves

  • You just need to give yourself a good kick in the rear-end.
  • You need a hobby!
  • You’re not trying hard enough
  • Just pull yourself together
  • There are others that are worse off than you
  • Everyone gets a little depressed every once in a while – this one really sends me over the edge
  • You have it so good why aren’t you happy?
  • You just need to pray
  • You should take vitamins for your stress
  • You’ll be ok just hang in there it will soon pass
  • I thought you were stronger than that

© 2017  All Rights Reserved Paul Cox


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